Bad Bridesmaid: Bachelorette Brawls and Taffeta Tantrums. What We Go Through For Her Big Day

Bad Bridesmaid: an underachieving, inadequate, sinful, vulgar, naughty or disobedient bridal attendant. Usually characterized by eye-rolling, drunkenness, lack of pantyhose and an overdrawn bank account.

Siri Agrell didn’t mean to become a bad bridesmaid. It just kind of happened when this National Post columnist innocently asked—via a newspaper piece—if it was really necessary for the bride’s best and most loyal friends to endure 12 months of themed showers, endless fittings and the inevitable “taffeta terror” of coming face to face with the chosen dress. Agrell got her answer when she was promptly fired as a bridesmaid. But her friend’s loss is a win for the millions of women-in-waiting who, despite the fact that they love their brides, can’t quite believe what they’re being asked to swallow along with their champagne.

Part memoir (including both Agrell’s story and countless other confessions of bridesmaids-gone-bad) and part cultural analysis, Bad Bridesmaid is wholly and smartly funny, a stiletto-heel print on an ivory silk train. Bad Bridesmaid devilishly dissects the hilarious, expensive and unbelievable experiences of leading a treasured friend down the aisle, and asks why it all has to be so damn difficult. From the history of bridesmaids—who in ancient times were used as decoys—to their contemporary role of strapless dress–wearing servitude—Agrell covers it all.

Why are we powerless against the shower’s reign? Why do we not demand more than a one-night stand with our bridesmaid dress? Does anyone really want to watch a male stripper?